Advice for my niggas.
A woman knows from the first moment she wants to fuck you or not. She knows if she WILL fuck you within the first 5 minutes of you speaking. So your job as a man is to not say dumb shit in that first 5 minutes to talk your way out of the pussy.
Just spreading some wisdom for the niggas that fuck themselves outta getting fucked without even knowing it. I wanna see y’all fix your shit up & prosper.
(via pussymitosis)
Source: lyriciss
I have orientation in two weeks and idk how i feel about that.
i dont care what you say there is nothing more stressful than wanting to have a conversation with someone but having absolutely NOTHING to say
(via urbancatfitters)
Source: fasterfood
[whispers] sexism is Very Real and Very Important but please stop finding it in everything because you are just trivializing it.
(via urbancatfitters)
Source: kanyewestniall
is there a website where i can meet rich people who will buy expensive things for me and expect absolutely nothing in return
JJK Airbrush - “I ripped some paper and drew some rocks on it. Now try to see this as a flat surface. And trust me…it is as flat as it can be” (via)
(via bluomari)
Source: farewell-kingdom
looks like some of y’all will have a little problem next year
(via urbancatfitters)
Source: pulitzerprincess
Source: thelaughingmango
After succumbing to a fever of some sort in 1705, Irish woman Margorie McCall was hastily buried to prevent the spread of whatever had done her in. Margorie was buried with a valuable ring, which her husband had been unable to remove due to swelling. This made her an even better target for body snatchers, who could cash in on both the corpse and the ring.
The evening after Margorie was buried, before the soil had even settled, the grave-robbers showed up and started digging. Unable to pry the ring off the finger, they decided to cut the finger off. As soon as blood was drawn, Margorie awoke from her coma, sat straight up and screamed.
The fate of the grave-robbers remains unknown. One story says the men dropped dead on the spot, while another claims they fled and never returned to their chosen profession.
Margorie climbed out of the hole and made her way back to her home.
Her husband John, a doctor, was at home with the children when he heard a knock at the door. He told the children, “If your mother were still alive, I’d swear that was her knock.”
When he opened the door to find his wife standing there, dressed in her burial clothes, blood dripping from her finger but very much alive, he dropped dead to the floor. He was buried in the plot Margorie had vacated.
Margorie went on to re-marry and have several children. When she did finally die, she was returned to Shankill Cemetery in Lurgan, Ireland, where her gravestone still stands. It bears the inscription “Lived Once, Buried Twice.”
what did i just read
(via urbancatfitters)
Source: spoookyscary





